Could you be ANY cuter?

The answer to that question is either an embarrassing “MOM!” (with an appropriate eyeroll) or a simple, “Yep!”

My daughter turns six today (technically at 2:47pm for all you birth charters out there) and I look forward to making this time all about her.

But on every birthday, I always look forward to a moment I have to myself where I sit and ponder,…”What is she going to be like this next year?”

Is she going to learn to be more independent?

Is she going to read a whole book on her own?

Will she be brave enough to try to something new?

Now, it’s also about how I myself, am going to be this next year as well.

Am I going to learn to let go more? Let her learn about making mistakes and NOT jump in and help? Will I be brave enough to let her explore and experience more?

Am I going to better about my short temper and do my best to teach with grace and a sense of calm? I’m really working on that. She pushes my buttons. HARD (thanks, Brandon for passing down your argumentative traits).

But here’s the thing: she’s really just like me. JUST. LIKE. ME. All of me from 1992/1993.

She loves to dance, in her own interpretive style, which I love watching. Her facial expressions are the best. The pure dramatic flare she puts into each performance is outstanding. She loves to sing, she can actually out-diva me,…ME! We’ve actually argued on who gets to sing the Elsa parts in “Let It Go”. I’ve slowly been winning those fights lately. She loves art, she sees it different, just like me. She really focuses on what she’s doing. I love watching her process.

The last six years have been the best adventure I’ve ever purposely signed up for. The waitlist for it took almost five years, but it was worth every second, every challenge, every fucking disappointment.

13 months ago, I endured the most tragic, traumatic, painful heartbreak of my life when my husband died. But when I tell you that this little girl showed not only me, but the entire world, her strength, her kindness, her light, her inner sparkle,…it floored me.

The moment I had to tell her that her daddy died, she beat me when getting the words out.

“Did my daddy die?”

I just held her and she held me tighter. It’s been that way since. She has only cried about him on a few occasions. Very few occasions.

She’s brave. SO MUCH BRAVER THAN I HAVE EVER BEEN OR COULD BE.

The first day of kindergarten was hard. But we did it. We did the thing. She did it.

We were in her classroom, getting her settled in. I’d love to say that she looked nervous, but she honestly was just soaking it all in. I crouched down to her desk and asked if she wanted me to stay for a while. She nodded. She looked around. Then back at me. I’ll never forget the next words she said…

“You can go now, Mom. ” I was taken back but I was so damn proud. I could hear her father’s laugh in my head. He would have enjoyed that moment.

Later that day, her teacher, Mrs. Brown, called me and told me the words I was not expecting. “She’s a true leader. ” That day just got more emotional. I was not leadership material as a little girl nor when I was growing up. Always wanted to be, because I had this image in my head of what a strong leader was: Bold, Confident, Assertive. It’s not true. A leader has kindness and empathy. Steps up when a problem arises, takes care of their people. She does that. Every day with her friends, family and classmates.

She was such a happy baby and every year after that, she’s grown into her own little world and created her own happiness, without boundaries.

I may be utterly biased, but my kid is the best. She’s polite, kind, funny, curious, stubborn, dramatic, charming, …and my absolute favorite personality trait, she’s a whole lot of sass. I’m proud to say that gets that from her mother.

Emma keeps me on my toes. She always wants to be around me. She’s never afraid to come to me. Her excitement makes the room light up. Her love radiates. She makes a complete stranger become her friend, just by being kind. And that’s all from her. I don’t make her do any of it. She chooses to be kind. I will take half the credit on teaching her that the best superpower to have is the ability to spread kindness. Her daddy gets the other half. His legacy will live on with her.

Emma adores her all her aunts and uncles and cousins. She does not favor one grandparent over any of the others. She is OBSESSED with her teacher (I’m kind of obsessed too-she’s quite an amazing human and I’m always in awe of her).

She cherishes her friendships, like you should. She is brilliant. She is beautiful. She is going to do amazing BIG things in this world and I will make sure those big dreams of hers will happen, no matter what.

I’m so proud of her and I’m so proud to be her mom and I get to call her my kid. She’s special. I love her so much. She is my world.

I gave her life, part of my name, my heart, my soul, her voice, and all of my love. I will continue to give her anything I can until I can no longer. She is my rock. She is what saved me. She is all I ever wanted.

She was destined to be mine.